Dear Britt, this week I've been #9
|and that someone is me a lot of the time..|
Aaah thanks babe, I had a lot of fun writing it!
I am starting to like autumn as well. But I cannot wait untill winter comes!
The heating in the stores and public transportation is rediculous, I am freezing my tits off on the train home, but I am sweating on the metro to school. They should really fix that.
I can completely understand the amount of stress you must have with not being able to sing all week.
But the only thing you can do right now is just let your body recover at it's own pace. And take some extra vitamins here and there of course. And not wearing sheer tights for a while, but just jeans and boots with a big scarf and a jumper will probably help as well.
This week has been a bit of a weird one. I was on the edge of crying the entire week and so did a lot of my classmates. It's probably the fact that we're now making a lot progress in our classes. Or the fact that we are becoming more of a family, which gives us the space to cry (a lot) in front of eachother. Eitherway it was a good thing.
I think my classes are going well, mixed with classes that don't give me that same feeling.
There's just one class that I attend with my demon by my side. The one that tells me I am not doing good enough, the one that makes sure I feel like I am just not going to make it this year.
One of my classmates said: It's like searching for the color blue, without knowing what blue looks like. And that's exactly what it feels like. I know I am looking for that color, but I just cannot seem to find it. And I know that the fact that I don't know what the color blue looks like should give me some sort of relieved feeling. Because that means I cannot be frustrated or upset, because I don't know what I am looking for. So one of my other classmates suggested I'd search for the color green first, or just any other color I do know. Which is the most logical thing to do. It's just not something you think of, because you want to succeed right away. Whenever I don't get something right away in that class I start to panic, just a little. Everyone is talking about four years. But all I can think is: it's just four years. I've already had four years and those went by in a second flash.
But I am a lot calmer now. After a lovely fridaynight and saturdaymorning with my person and her people!
Because as one my classmates said; When I find the color blue I will recognize it right away and it will be my blue.
I have really wise and supportive classmates. (Will I ever stop bragging about them? Probably not)
I hope you had a great first day at your new job.
Kisses on your elbows,